A bad day

Hello all,

I really hope my last post did not offend anyone – I am worried as no-one has left a comment on it 😦

So I went to the fancy dress party and had a wonderful time, got a bit wild, got it all out of my system. But since then…

I’m trying to stay positive but I keep compiling a mental list of things I can’t do instead of focusing on what I can do.

I think I want these crazy experiences and meaningless relationships because the truth is, I can’t have a meaningful one – and if I did it would break my heart to know I can’t spend more than a couple of years with him at best.

I’m sorry for my more negative slant on things, it just all got on top of me today.

Karen x


38 thoughts on “A bad day

  1. autosoma says:

    My wife survived her stage 3c cancer but still has difficulties seeing a future… it’s tough so I feel for you… enjoy more parties


    • I am so sorry to hear that 😦 funnily enough I have decided I don’t want to talk about my cancer on here in much detail, almost want to ignore it but the doctor basically said there is nothing they can do for me which is difficult to deal with.


  2. autosoma says:

    I understand, it was a very difficult, emotional time when she was diagnosed. Is there a specific cancer charity close to your heart I give to in your honour, or maybe teenage cancer trust as it covers teens to 25 year olds


  3. autosoma says:

    Ok, well my wife now works for cancer research in Islington, she recommends finding your nearest Maggie’s centre as they do spa’s, retreats, massages and facials at no cost.


      • autosoma says:

        Well, if you consider that after surgery, when she started chemo the literature from Macmillan said that you could fuck as normal as long as we used protection so that the chemo drugs wouldn’t be passed to me. It was generally at day nine we had to stop until the start of the next chemo cycle. Actually, it killed her wild streak as she did burlesque and we stopped the 3somes cos other women freak at mastectomies. So, no she concentrated on keeping together as our children were five and two when the diagnosis changed her/our lives.


      • autosoma says:

        Ok, We’ll have a think about it, the amount of her girlfriends that ditched because of cancerphobia was shocking and hurtful, a few stuck by her, Annette Betty for example, she was going to do a free fund raiser. Getting to the five year survival point, is my wife’s key issue now. But thanks again a lot of people totally freak over mastectomy scars. So what’s going to be your wild list?


      • autosoma says:

        Well I’m totally sure you will, Actually, I just mentioned it to my wife and she’s just surprised me by saying yes. I have noticed that after three years she getting back to her old self


  4. Well if I were you I’d do one thing at a time. Even if your bucket list isn’t over you can start doing some stuff…. You know you don’t have to think about it all the time if you feel like doing it even if the bucket list isn’t over and done. You might even discover stuff you wanna do that you haven’t thought of while doing some of it AND realise some stuff are not what you really are into after all. Not letting you down. Peace Out!! xoxoxxo


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